What Water TaUght ME
An experimental documentary. 
What Water Taught Me is an experimental documentary that explores climate justice, complex PTSD, embodied trauma, moral injury, and the reciprocal possibilities of healing between humanity and nature. It is framed around my lived experience of Hurricane Matthew (2016), Hurricane Florence (2018), and the recovery process - both my own healing and the land itself.

It also examines the failure of the North Carolina State Government to properly distribute the federal relief funds to it's citizens after these disasters and call for accountability. Despite personally spending hours on paperwork at various state relief offices applying for support from the state, first for Hurricane Matthew, attending local government meetings, writing to the press and government organization and speaking out at climate justice rallies, I attempted to conclude this work with art exhibition. The only option we were given was to take an SBA loan (which rolled our previous mortgage into our new mortgage) and rebuild on the same land. No other options, even the option to move, was available to us.

In November of 2017, we moved into our rebuilt home. It was destroyed in September 2018 by Hurricane Matthew. Out of other options, we followed the laws to clear the land of as much debris as possible with the support of citizen volunteers and boarded up the property. I moved my family out of state at that point and continued to try to get relief for myself and the polluted land and waters around my home and others, and applying for financially relief through the state.

I never received any grant money through RebuildNC, who was operating the relief funds. Eventually, in 2020, after becoming deeply debt as a direct result, I was able to find some help through a charity who bought out the property, and two others - and they tore down all the buildings to restore to wetlands. No one can build on the property again, except Earth herself.

While this offered some relief, it had taken an extreme toll on me and my family. In 2021, the complexPTSD combined with natural disaster trauma and stress of lack of support resulted in my need to attend an inpatient program for my health, and a sabbatical from art and teaching from 2021-2024. I claimed bankruptcy and started over in 2024 completely, as I was never able to recover financially. As of October 2024, I was informed that the North Carolina still had approximately $30 million of non-distributed  federal/state relief funds for Hurricane Florence alone.

This work is an early version that is in process, currently only shared with a small community.

Hurricane Matthew (2016)

Following Hurricane Matthew in 2016, North Carolina faced challenges in distributing federal relief funds, leading to delays and some instances of funds being unaccounted for. Investigations revealed issues with state administration of federal grants, including improper contracting and slow disbursement of funds. The state received over $236 million in federal funds, but faced scrutiny over the use of a significant portion of the funds. [1, 2, 3]
Elaboration: [1, 2]
  • Federal Relief Funds: North Carolina received substantial federal funding following Hurricane Matthew, exceeding $236 million. [1, 2]
  • Challenges in Disbursement: The state struggled to effectively manage and distribute these funds, leading to slow progress in rebuilding and a shortage of funds for some affected individuals. [1, 2, 3]
  • Improper Contracting: The state's contracting practices were found to be deficient, with some contracts not meeting federal requirements, forcing them to be rebid. [2, 4]
  • Slow Spending: North Carolina was criticized for being a "slow spender," with a significant amount of federal funds remaining unspent and some funds potentially unaccounted for. [1, 5]
  • Lack of Transparency: The state's communication and transparency regarding the use of disaster relief funds were also criticized, with some individuals and lawmakers expressing concerns about the lack of accountability. [6, 7]
  • Investigations and Reports: Reports from the U.S. Office of Inspector General and the North Carolina Program Evaluation Division highlighted the issues with the state's handling of federal relief funds. [1, 2]

Sources
[1] https://www.wral.com/story/federal-audit-questions-nc-contracts-used-to-help-rebuild-after-hurricane-matthew-says-2-5-million-in-funds-unaccounted-for/20489028/
[2] https://ncnewsline.com/2022/05/27/unnatural-disaster-a-special-pw-series-on-north-carolinas-struggles-to-aid-homeowners-displaced-by-hurricane-matthew/
[3] https://www.newsobserver.com/news/politics-government/article295575169.html
[4] https://www.newsobserver.com/news/politics-government/article230609439.html
[5] https://www.nytimes.com/2018/09/24/us/north-carolina-florence-matthew-disaster-aid.html
[6] https://ncnewsline.com/2025/01/29/why-is-rebuild-nc-involved-in-disaster-management-in-western-north-carolina/
[7] https://www.newsobserver.com/news/politics-government/article269992622.html
[-] https://www.wral.com/hurricane-matthew/17382810/

Hurricane Florence (2018)

Hurricane Florence devastated North Carolina in 2018, leading to numerous investigations and criticism regarding the state's response and relief efforts. Audits revealed inadequate oversight of disaster recovery funds by state agencies, and ongoing challenges with allocating and disbursing funds for homeowners and infrastructure repairs persist. [1, 2, 3, 4]
Key Issues and Criticisms: [1, 1, 3, 3]
  • Lack of Oversight: State auditors highlighted a lack of proper monitoring and accountability for how disaster relief funds were spent by agencies like the Department of Public Safety. [1, 1, 3, 3]
  • Delays in Relief: Many Hurricane Florence and Hurricane Matthew victims in North Carolina, including those in the ReBuild NC program, faced extended wait times for aid and housing assistance. [2, 2, 4, 4]
  • Shortfalls and Increased Costs: The ReBuild NC program, established to assist homeowners with repairs, faced a significant deficit due to factors like fluctuating construction costs and the rapid pace of construction. [2, 2, 4, 4]
  • Unequal Distribution: Some reports indicated disparities in how relief funds were distributed, with some areas receiving more assistance than others. [2, 2, 4, 4, 5]
  • Inadequate Funding: The state received less federal funding than it requested, and even with additional funding from the legislature, the ReBuild NC program struggled to meet the needs of all applicants. [2, 2, 4, 4]
  • Financial Mismanagement: Reports suggest financial mismanagement within the ReBuild NC program, with questions raised about how funds were allocated and spent. [1, 1, 4, 4]
Specific Examples: [2]
  • The state requested $1.1 billion in federal funding through the Community Development Block Grant (CDBG) program but received only $542 million. [2]
  • ReBuild NC was facing a $175 million shortfall in funding, with 1,523 families accepted into the program still waiting for assistance. [2]
  • The state released only $2 million of the $266 million in federal rebuilding money intended for low-income homeowners. [6]
Investigations and Responses: [2, 2, 7, 7]
  • GOP lawmakers have called for investigations into the ReBuild NC program and its handling of disaster relief funds. [2, 2, 7, 7]
  • The Office of the State Auditor conducted a performance audit of the Department of Public Safety's oversight of Hurricane Florence recovery funds, which identified significant deficiencies. [3, 8, 8]
  • State lawmakers have provided additional funding for ReBuild NC, but the agency continues to seek further resources. [2, 2]
  • Some reports attribute the shortfall in the ReBuild NC program to factors like the accelerated pace of construction and fluctuating construction costs. [4, 4]

Sources:
[1] https://www.newsobserver.com/news/politics-government/article296993354.html
[2] https://www.newsobserver.com/news/politics-government/article295575169.html
[3] https://ncnewsline.com/briefs/state-audit-blasts-department-of-public-safetys-handling-of-hurricane-florence-disaster-recovery-funds/
[4] https://insideclimatenews.org/news/16102024/rebuild-nc-deficit-after-hurricanes-matthew-florence/
[5] https://www.carolinajournal.com/audit-ncdps-didnt-accurately-report-data-to-hud-because-they-didnt-fully-understand-requirements/
[6] https://www.nytimes.com/2018/09/24/us/north-carolina-florence-matthew-disaster-aid.html
[7] https://ncnewsline.com/briefs/gop-lawmakers-move-to-fund-final-stretch-of-rebuild-nc-after-years-of-financial-woes/
[8] https://www.auditor.nc.gov/documents/reports/performance/per-2025-4900a/open

Climate Justice

Interview for Earth Talks 2022
​with Gabriella Robinson
SeattleU Student Environmental Justice Center
Learn More

After the Storm

View the Article​​

"After the Storm" was an art project focused on the aftermath of Hurricane Matthew, which destroyed my home and many others in Cumberland County and Robenson County, NC in 2016. This exhibition was shown in Fayetteville, North Carolina at The Arts Gallery at Fayetteville Technical Community College in May 2018, 4 months before Hurricane Florence hit and destroyed my home again in September 2018.
​Supporting Photography by Eddie Harris. 
Yes, thousands of ReBuild NC homeowners impacted by Hurricane Matthew and Florence have not received promised funds, and many are still waiting for their homes to be repaired or rebuilt. The state program, ReBuild NC, has faced significant financial challenges and delays, resulting in a deficit and leaving many homeowners in limbo. [1, 2, 3, 4, 5]
Here's a more detailed look at the issue: [1, 1]
  • Delayed Federal Funding: Federal disaster relief funds from HUD were slow to arrive after Hurricane Matthew, and the same issue was experienced after Hurricane Florence. HUD didn't dedicate the full amount of Matthew funds until 2017, and Florence's aid took nearly a year. [1, 1]
  • ReBuild NC Deficit: ReBuild NC has a deficit of over $150 million, according to a report from Inside Climate News. The agency's budget has nearly doubled since the programs were established, and it's still unclear how the shortfall will be addressed. [1, 1, 6, 6, 7]
  • Construction Costs and Pace: Inside Climate News attributed the deficit to "fluctuating construction costs" and the rapid pace of homebuilding. [1, 1]
  • Ongoing Challenges: Despite the millions of dollars allocated, more than 1,150 families are still waiting for new homes or work on their damaged homes. [4, 4]
  • Contractor Issues: Some contractors withdrew from the program due to delays in payment from the state, with some contractors expressing reluctance to work in North Carolina again. [8, 8, 9, 9]
  • Legislative Response: Lawmakers have been seeking additional funding for ReBuild NC to complete the recovery efforts, but there are ongoing debates and concerns about the agency's management and finances. [4, 4, 10, 10]
[1] https://insideclimatenews.org/news/16102024/rebuild-nc-deficit-after-hurricanes-matthew-florence/
[2] https://www.wral.com/news/local/princeville-resident-awaits-rebuild-nc-funds-hurricane-matthew/
[3] https://www.wunc.org/politics/2024-11-08/after-years-of-delays-ncs-hurricane-housing-program-could-run-out-of-money
[4] https://abc11.com/post/wnc-recovery-hurricane-survivors-anywhere-north-carolina-may-not-get-homes-rebuilt-additional-200m/15849512/
[5] https://ncnewsline.com/2025/01/29/why-is-rebuild-nc-involved-in-disaster-management-in-western-north-carolina/
[6] https://ncnewsline.com/2024/11/18/rebuild-nc-has-a-221m-deficit-officials-say-as-program-director-again-faces-call-to-resign/
[7] https://ncnewsline.com/briefs/gop-lawmakers-move-to-fund-final-stretch-of-rebuild-nc-after-years-of-financial-woes/
[8] https://sites.ncleg.gov/houseoversight/2023/04/rebuild-nc-makes-changes-must-do-more/
[9] https://ncnewsline.com/2022/05/27/unnatural-disaster-a-special-pw-series-on-north-carolinas-struggles-to-aid-homeowners-displaced-by-hurricane-matthew/
[10] https://www.bpr.org/2025-01-30/hurricane-housing-program-north-carolina-funding